Evening

So I guess you could say today has been a fairly productive day.  I looked at 3 apartments, opened a checking account, went out to lunch for the first time in months, and did some shopping.  I got a few nice things at the Goodwill store...  I love those resale shops.

My son is going through some stuff with his ex girlfriend.  The bought a car together (first mistake), and he let her put the title in her name (second mistake).  Anyway, he had it parked permanently at the shop where it works because it doesn't run.  She said she was going to sell the car.  He told her that she couldn't until she paid the storage fees to the shop.  She then distracted him, and had the car towed.  A lot of this could have been avoided by keeping all their stuff separate.  It is hard enough for married people, let alone two single people to divide or claim mutual items.  You live and you learn...

I'm in good spirits, worked on some digital art for awhile this evening.  Some of my handiwork can be seen on the Welcome! page and on the journal pages.  The Jesus pic, not the NA emblem.  I ate a great salad today, first time in awhile.  It was kinda expensive though, but it was all you can eat soup and salad.  I haven't been to a restaurant in months, and it was a nice treat.

That's about it for tonight.  I have my blog pretty much the way I want it for now, so now it is time to apply myself to some legitimate content.  I am going to post some articles concerning bible study, but not tonight.

Thank You Father for the many blessings You have bestowed upon my family and myself.  Help us to see our need and see our Savior.  

In Jesus' name,
Amen

Morning

I had a blast yesterday working on this blog.  I worked on it literally all day.  When it got to be night I started getting a little aggravated with a couple things, and I said to myself "self, the minute you become aggravated with this is the minute it is time to call it quits for the night".  So I did.  The funny thing about that is, when you take your conscious focus off of something it gives your subconscious room to breathe and work, and the answer to the problems will usually just pop into your head when the subconscious finishes computing the answer.  Isn't God amazing?  He designed us so that our mind performs background operations without us having to put any effort into it.  Wow...

If I can get my son up (it's his day off) we are supposed to go look at a couple apartments, open bank accounts, and go grocery shopping.  We have a pretty full day of stuff to do.  I even may get a haircut.  I feel pretty good, though I do miss Anne and my daughter.  I don't think that will ever change, and at least animosity doesn't have a foothold in my heart any longer.  Satan tries to keep us down any way he can.  The battlefield is truly in the mind.  That is why both Christianity and Narcotics Anonymous push community and guidance, Christianity through discipleship and mentorship, NA through sponsorship and a "we".  We are able to get an untainted view of our thoughts and actions, both past and future from those we love and trust.  My sponsor is like a master at seeing past the emotional turmoil to a calmer, more rational outcome for most situations.  If I didn't have his guidance, well, I would be guiding myself.  Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, rolled the T-shirt up and smoked it...  You get the picture.

Father, thank you for my sponsor, and the "we" you have put into my life.  May my circle of clean, forward looking friends continue to grow exponentially.  Please have Your Spirit whisper words of comfort in the ears of my friends Chris S David W, Bill, Lynn, and Anne.  Times may be tough, but You are sovereign. 

In Jesus' name,
Amen

Untitled, from a 2009 draft...

Hello all, It has been a little while since my last post but it is not due to anything going wrong, in fact life is getting better every day. I feel extremely blessed, and I am looking forward to what God has in store for my future and the future of my family. I would like to extend a special hello to Chris Sorrells and Amy Hofmeier. I have known you guys for a long time, and we all have been through much. You both are in my prayers, and you hold a special place in my heart.

Here at Homes of Hope, we have been doing a study called Wild at Heart by John Eldredge. The study deals with the wildness that was instilled in men by God, and how we do or don't deal with it. The study culminated with a short retreat at the Wesleyan youth camp near Table Rock. We had a great time in the Lord, and a great time of food, fun and fellowship. At one point we were asked 3 questions and sent off by ourselves for a couple of hours to hear from the Big Man Himself. The questions were as follows:

1. What is my purpose

2. What have I received during my time at Homes of Hope

3. What do I still need to change about myself

As far as my purpose is concerned, I asked God to show me the grandiose vision he has for me, and He was silent. I asked Him how I was going to impact the world, and He was silent. Finally, I asked Him How I could best represent Him, and he told me to be the priest of my house. He told me to be a Holy example to my wife and daughter. This is my purpose until further notice. Oddly enough I am completely at ease with this. I am not afraid of small beginnings, and though I will be turning 43 this year, I feel like I am just now becoming a man, just now becoming the man God wants me to be, and just now becoming the man my family needs me to be. I am including video responses to the other 2 questions. For those of you who don't know, I lost a front tooth in a work related accident, and have since broken the plate that was made for me, so don't be surprised at the missing tooth! I am also posting some pictures from the retreat, which included Pretty Place at Camp Greenville, and Lake Keowee. The wrap-up is done by Ted Cochran, the director of operations at Homes of Hope, and the man most responsible for the curriculum and welfare of the interns and intern program.

Anne is about 26 days into a 40 day fast, and I know that this is about where it starts getting really rough, not that it hasn't been rough on her already. I am praying that God will reveal things to her that were previously hidden, and grow her past the point that she expected to be at. God likes to exceed expectations, and I know he will do so for her. Please pray for her as she comes to remembrance.

1/9/2013 Morning

I learned something about the greenhouse effect yesterday.  I work in a lot of apartments without electricity, so I had to come up with a way to keep my sandwich meat cold while I working.  I realized I could put it in a large zip-loc bag and put it on the windowsill and it would stay frosty.  I did that yesterday, but I didn't take one thing into account; the sun.  A sealed bag on a white sill in direct sunlight with sandwich meat in it does not stay cold even if it is cold outside.  It actually got warm.  I was hungry.  I ate half of a sandwich made with the meat, and didn't finish it because it tasted weird.  Did I mention it was chicken?  Anyway, the point is that I have a tumultuous stomach this morning and am not working.  We don't have any paint anyway, so I guess if I had to get sick, the timing was perfect.

I listened to a few Ravi Zacharias talks yesterday.  I didn't realize how much I missed listening to him.  He is a Christian apologist, and has an amazing grasp of what it is to understand God.  I have been listening to him for years, long before I began to listen to John MacArthur.  I say listening, but listening isn't always hearing.  Even my buddy was able to appreciate the messages.  I have included a widget in the right hand pane for anyone else who would like to get their Ravi on... 

You know, I don't think there has been a point in my life where all of my waking moments are focused on God and recovery like they are now.  That is literally almost all I think about, and my other thoughts are always filtered through those two subjects.  Something is happening in my heart.  Everything makes me tear up, even the most mundane topic.  It can be a little embarrassing being all teary eyed while I am working, but you know what?  I don't really care what anyone else thinks because I know what the Lord is doing in my life.

Today is going to be spent mainly working on this blog.  I have found it a good outlet to maintain my focus where it needs to be.  I was surprised to find the multitude of avenues that I go down concerning the topics of God and recovery when I began putting some serious effort into maintaining this blog.  I know that at some point I may lose interest and have to find a different outlet to help me to stay focused, but for now this is working just fine.

Father, thank You for showing me what the actual process of renewing my mind feels like.  Thank You that my mind no longer feels like a jumble of chaotic thoughts and noise, and that I am beginning  to experience an inner quiet.  I have only You to thank.  Please keep Your hand upon all my children and draw them ever closer to you.  Please cause me to be a light to those I come in contact with.  Please show Anne and I the road to peace and cooperation. 

In Jesus' name I pray,
Amen